Wednesday, March 08, 2006
kailangan ko ng kasama. kahit sinong tao. basta dito sa tabi ko. ngayon na. basta papakinggan nia sasabihin ko. kelangan ko ng yayakap saken. ung hindi maiilang pag nagsimula na ko magkwento at umiyak. ung sasabihan ako na matigas ang ulo ko. pero hindi magbabago ang tingin nia saken. ung hindi magsasawang makinig sa mga kwento ko kahit paulit ulit. T_T
i want to talk about relationships.
this may sound familiar. [kasi ilang beses ko na to inulit ulit sa blog ko]
ilang linggo na ba? dalawa? isa? basta ilang linggo na din.
we've been trying to patch things up. get things back to normal perhaps? nah. it's like 1 divided by 0. cannot be. but you know what reminded me of the past? its' the way he acts. he's still the kid i once adored. nothing has changed. he's still a... uhmmm.. well... a kid..
my life would be a lot better..oookkaaayy.. and easier too..if he's not around. i tried it already. and i wont mind trying it again. and the only thing that's holding me back are the good memories that we've shared..on second thought...the reason why i'm still here is because i am waiting for the time he'll eventually grow up..uhmmm..can i have another second thought? maybe i am just waiting for any sign of his appreciation for my existence.. that i badly want to feel..
can i talk about other things?
okay so here's another.
i think this inspired me to post these things.
an old friend IM-ed me. i still considered him as a friend until this afternoon. i cant blame him for forgetting everything because it has been a long time since we talked and texted each other. and after i closed the window, the confirmation that i really lost him slapped me. but now, when i look at it, it doesn't seem to hurt that much. a little sad maybe but not painful. maybe because we don't share good and bad times together. we're friends just because of....company?
can i talk about another one?
my intentions are good. but i feel so bad. i dont want him to feel that way..i dont want him to think that way. i want to take back everything i've said. but obviously..i cannot do that.
***I AM HAPPY THOUGH I HAVE TO LET GO OF SOME PEOPLE. I DONT WANT TO SAY I'VE GOT BETTER REPLACEMENTS.. BECAUSE PEOPLE CANNOT SIMPLY BE REPLACED.. WHAT IS GONE..IS GONE.. BUT I CAN SAY I AM CONTENTED.. AND I KNOW WHAT I OPTED FOR WAS PROPER.. LOOK WHERE IT LED ME.. AND WHAT I FOUND.. HAPPINESS.. IN THE ARMS OF THOSE THAT TRULY LOVE ME..
[salamat po sa pagbasa ng sinulat ko]
